Adventures in Syberspace

When Fantasy Football is Bad

So I was at the Bears game a couple Sundays ago, for the first time since I got tickets off of the radio and went with Heidi in 1996. I dressed for success, with success defined as "I Will Not be Cold." 6 layers later, I looked a skinny man in an orange fat-suit (see below)

 

But that is not why I'm blogging. I was sitting in the north end zone (end zone seats are great, especially when the Bears scored all 3 of their TDs in my end). You can acutally see me in the picture below, the orange blob at the top in the middle . You'll also notice a young man in a white Vikings jersey across the aisle from me, on the top left.

 

So the Bears scored a TD in the first half, and of course the fans are all high-fiving, and I look over and see this guy in a Vikings jersey ALSO clapping. I am a little surprised, and I wonder if maybe he is confused, just clapping because everyone around him was clapping. So I ask him: why are you clapping? His reply: "Greg Olson is on my fantasy team."

He is wearing a very expensive Jared Allen Authentic Minnesota Vikings road jersey, and his team has just gotten scored on, and he's cheering. Because his own personal fantasy football team just got 6 points.

Now, I did start playing fantasy football last year, because I was asked to join by some of my former students, and it has become a fun way to connect with them. But it is simply wrong when your team devotion is trumped by your personal devotion to a pretend team of players. I don't even mind if you have players from a rival team on your own team, because it's sometimes too hard to avoid. But when they do well at the expense of your own (actual) team, you shouldn't cheer. You should be sad.

One of the things that makes following sports fun is the camaraderie of your shared experience with fellow fans. There is a "we" to it. When your team does something well, you exult in it with fellow fans, high-fiving and celebrating. When they fail, you process with each other. There is something of a "shadow team" amongst the fans, what the Bears refer to as the "4th phase" of the game (in addition to the three phases of offense, defense, and special teams). But there is no "we" in Fantasy sports. It is only "I." And that guy who spent a lot of money on his jersey and his ticket to the Bears game should get his priorities straight.

Cubs.com: Have you been paying attention?

I got an e-mail today from cubs.com asking me to sign up to receive free game-day photographs sent to my AT&T phone. I don't have an AT&T phone so this doesn't apply to me, but I love how they sell it: "Get pictures of Carlos Marmol closing out another Cubs win, Alfonso Soriano crushing another homer onto Waveland Avenue & more exciting moments...."

Wouldn't you think if this was sent by cubs.com that someone who had some knowledge of the Cubs would have been consulted before sending it out? Carlos Marmol doesn't close games out. He's got 3 saves, but our closer is Kevin Gregg. And Soriano? Hitting home runs? Onto WAVELAND? The guy hadn't hit one before last week since June 7th, and only 3 of his 16 home runs have come at Wrigley. And none that I recall landed on Waveland. I just want to throw it out there that I'm available for editing e-mails if anyone at cubs.com wants to not embarrass themselves anymore.

Letters to the Editor sometimes work

So last year about this time, I took my son to a Cubs game and when we went to the bathroom, we had to endure 3-4 minutes of being stuck in an enclosed space with lots of people smoking, blatantly ignoring the "no smoking" signs. I didn't care for that, so I sent a letter to Wrigley, and one to the Tribune that got published in the Sunday paper (the best part was that my mom happened to be in town that Sunday, read my letter to the editor that Sunday morning without my suggestion, and didn't even read the name to notice it was her son!) It got a lot of comments online, with some people suggesting I shouldn't bring a child to a game, and opening a dialogue about smokers' rights vs. non-smokers' rights. Here was my suggestion: "Post signs that anyone caught smoking in the restrooms will be escorted from the park. Then send a security guard into the bathrooms every 15 minutes to enforce it."

Fast forward to yesterday at Wrigley. I took a friend and two of my daughters to a game. Upon entering the restroom this time, I saw a new green sign: "Smokers Will be Subject to Ejection." And an attendant at the front door. And no sign of a lit cigarette anywhere. OK so maybe it wasn't JUST my suggestion that caused the change, but I'm going to take full credit anyway.

My work here is done.

Facebook Rant

No, I'm not ranting about the "new Facebook" (although I did like the old one better, but I'm sure I'll just get used to the new one eventually) and I'm not ranting about how much of a time-waster Facebook is (although it certainly is that). My rant has to do with getting friended by people that I haven't seen or talked to, or in some cases, even thought about in almost 20 years, and there's no message at all. Just "Roger Daltrey added you as a friend on Facebook." (Good old Roger-- I need to catch up with him).

You can't just do that. It would be like bumping into someone you haven't seen for 20 years at the mall, smiling and saying, "Hello," and then you just keep walking. It's a drive-by friending. I don't like that-- there needs to be some sort of acknowledgement of the fact that we're long lost friends. Don't you agree? Bad Facebook etiquette. I mean, if we're going to be Facebook friends, that has to mean something.

My rant of the day, published in the Tribune

I wrote this letter to the Chicago Tribune and it was published online, and has started a nice little dialogue on the Tribune comment board. I've been patronized and ridiculed online, everyone!! Pretty exciting. And I was told that Wrigley Field is no place for a 5 year old. Brilliant! You can read all of the comments here. Below is what I wrote, also available here. Let me know if you think I'm being unreasonable, or if my solution is a good one.

I took my five-year-old son to a game at Wrigley yesterday and the smoking in the bathrooms was awful. I'd rather they allow smoking in the stands than have to endure waiting for five minutes in an enclosed area where there's no escape from it. There's an easy solution, though: post signs that anyone caught smoking in the restrooms will be escorted from the park. Then send a security guard into the bathrooms every 15 minutes to enforce it. After the first few people are made examples of, people will realize it's not worth sacrificing the small fortune they had to pay for a ticket just to sneak a smoke.